“So, how are you doing?”
“Everything’s peachy. What about you? What are you doing now?”
“Long time no see, huh?”

As long as we were done with mandatory conversation, it looked like there was nothing else to be said. Middle school was a long time ago and we haven’t seen each other since. We could almost say we have nothing in common, except this really deep buried, ancient past. This, for a person with my kind of memory, is a very distant and almost forgotten past.

The old days were really the only thing we had and common and thus they had to be the theme for the current conversation. The trip’s long enough as well and we can’t just spend it all in the awkard silence two well-meaning people may get into when they really have nothing to say to eachother.
And when we’re trying to talk about the old days, we’ll eventually get to the question

“Have you been seeing someone from the old gang?”

To which I naturally and sincerely replied:

“Nope and thank goodness. It’s not like I miss most of those people.”

My memory may be terrible, but I have the faint impression my middle school years weren’t exactly the best years of my life. But the trip’s long and memory’s gotta be put to work, soon enough the good memories will flourish and we’ll recall some good people from the old panorama.
He tells me the school has a lot less children as of now. One, maybe two of our old school mates continued studying, the other one’s doing nothing out of his life, someone is having fun, you remember that girl from the seventh grade? NO? She was dating someone and then some else moved…

I can finally recall some of the good old peeps and, of course, some of the teachers too. We did find them terrible at the time, but now we have to admit they weren’t that bad, we just weren’t paying enough attention. And I had to say, if I knew what I know today, I wouldn’t have found some teacher’s indumentary as weird as I thought (you know, you get into college and professors are very weird with their clothing choices. They are all so weird it actually becomes normal, but I remember that it wasn’t so for the old teachers.)

Oh, we remembered when the computer age arrived. Computers on the library. First three, then five, then a whole room full of them. With those noisy modems and their speedy internet connections. We lost so many hours chatting as if that was the only thing the internet had to offer. If I was told I’d be a software engineer back then, I probably wouldn’t believe it. I was as silly as any other kid.

I admit that I don’t remember that much. In fact, he had a much fresher memory than I had, but it was good to go back in time and check all the people who used to be an important part of our lifes. They’re still around, some better off than others. And some of the teachers are still teaching, so, who knows, maybe when I have the time I’ll drop by for a cup of coffee.

_(Jn)

For those of you who can’t read due to portuguese content, it’s just a news article featuring huge levels of UV radiation in the entire country. That feels nice.

What now? It’s not like I have prescription sunglasses.

As if that’s not enough, these radical weather changes pretty much damaged my lips in ways I’m not comfortable with. I’m still wondering why weather damages them, but I guess it’s probably the same kind of magic that makes my router misbehave.

Oh, you’ve heard the new saying: “Busy is the new happy”.

But while the saying may be new, its concept entirely new to me. It’s always been true to me. Stopped is not my favorite state of mind, although sometimes I am forced to adopt it. Like today, I had to skip classes since the weekend was too damn tiresome and I have to freshen up. I feel almost hangoverish. I’m about to see if skipping classes was worth it.

Speaking of classes, having those after a week-long break is a hellova crash. Ah, I wish I had another week without classes, it was really nice to get home while the sun was still up. But that’s a whole ‘nother story, I guess.

These last few days have been really tiresome, yes. But it was precisely while I was just too tired to do anything else that I had an epiphany about my, let’s say, professional life. It made perfect sense back then. It still does, even though I’m a little less tired right now. I talked to some friends about it and they seem to be approving – telling me that yes, I should go for it. I think I’m already on my way and that makes me happy. Let’s see how it rolls.

Just so you won’t say I forgot about the Burning of the Ribbons this year, I’ll present you with this slightly Praxis related image!

This goes for pretty much everybody, except for a few good friends. As for the others, I do not wish to interrupt my alone time to engage in conversation. I want my alone time, I need my alone time. But since the channel through which I communicate with these few good friends is pretty much the same for everybody else, I’m showing myself and I’ll become a target. Other people can see me and assume I’m available for chatting when the truth is, I’m actually only trying to chill a little with my close friends. Engaging in conversation in my alone time is tiresome and annoying, I lack the proper patience for that and I do not wish to hear about anyone’s problems. It’s not the right time, we shoulnd’t be speaking right now, I’ve engaged rest mode and I do not wish to participate any longer. But, in order to do not come off as rude, I’ll try to talk a little bit, maybe I’ll be short in my answers to show I’m not really in the mood and maybe the other person will understand. Or maybe not, and then I’ll be stuck with a situation that’ll make me nervous. If continued, it may even make me become unpleasant.

Yeah, I know. It’s the internet. The problem has a simple, feasable solution. I just have to make myself unavailable.

But this is not just about the internet. My alone time transcends the internet: I also need to be physically alone, and most of the time, the people around me can’t see that.

I spend most of my days working and studying at college, so my needs for alone time were schedule right after waking up (one hour) and before going to sleep (if I’m not having classes that day, ofc). I meant those hours to be made of silence and peace, so I could engage in any projects or activities I want to without being bothered by someone else. But these hours are also the only hours I have at home: and thus, the only hours my family has my company. And that’s hard to reconcile and, unfortunantely, a problem without a simple solution like the internet’s.